Inventions
by colls
Summary: 4 things Seamus Harper invented and 1 thing he didn’t, but made anyway.


**Title:** Inventions  
**Author:** colls (Pic)  
**Warnings:** None.  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything. I'm not making a profit.

ONE  
It was rather hard to admit that one your greatest achievements laid in your past, but shrillers were probably one of the most useful and elegantly simple gadgets Harper had ever made. They are somewhat like dog whistles, with most of the sound in a range too high for human ears. Not too high, however, for someone with genetically modified hearing. In fact, if you could hear the full range of the whistle, it would give you a pretty intense headache. So much for the idea of "improved" hearing.

He still wore one of the small whistles around his neck. _You never know when you might need to temporarily incapacitate a Nietzschean_. Besides, it reminded him of home. To Harper, his home was like a badge of honor, even if no one else seemed impressed. He hadn't used it on Tyr, but every now and then he would reach up and toy with it. He swore the next time Tyr called him 'Boy' he was going to make him regret it.

TWO  
So, technically he didn't invent surfing. However, a man had to practice somehow, didn't he? One afternoon between getting shot at and being eaten by a space creature, Harper snagged a twisted panel from deck 8 and three Sparky colas from the Maru. He proceeded to lock himself in his machine shop. After accessing Andromeda's vast database of music, Harper had several 20th century Earth songs blaring throughout the room. He then put on his goggles and picked up his welding torch and got to work.

A few hours later, he was careening through the corridors on deck 12 on his modified anti-gravity sled. He whooped and hollered and felt he was really getting a feel for the thing. He had even painted a bright red racing stripe down the center as he felt the drab gray sheet of metal needed some personality.

Of course, it might've been a good idea to clear the deck first. Banking through an intersecting corridor, Harper planted his 'surf board' directly into Dylan's chest. The two of them ended up in a heap on the floor while his board slammed into a console. Harper got up, dusted himself off and lamented about the scuff to his paint job while Dylan merely glared at him.

THREE  
Harper and Trance used to invent games all the time. Back when she was purple, that is and before they pulled the High Guard warship out of that black hole. Their games would tend to be somewhat corny and would involve wagers of actual funds. Mostly they were born out of the fact that they were bored out of their skulls. For example, one bet would be that Beka would curse more times than Rev would invoke the Divine.

Then, one or the other would spend all day harassing Beka or Rev or try to head off the other from doing so. Trance would try to engage Rev in a theological debate, and Harper would create fake explosions in the cargo bay... that sort of thing. Of course, Harper's explosions usually got both Beka and Rev going, so it was like he was batting for both teams when he did that.

On board the Andromeda, they had slightly altered versions of it early on. Harper remembered losing both 'how many times Dylan would rush into an impossible situation' and 'how many push ups Tyr would do'. He still owed Trance for the last one. Who knew the man would cheat on that particular day and only do twenty?

Harper supposed that things just got so busy that they fell out of the habit. And then Trance went and got herself all gold-colored and serious. He still kept a running tally himself every now and then. _How many times will Captain Terrific make a speech today? How many times will Tyr be condescending?_

FOUR  
High Guard warships are meant to be manned by a large crew. The environmental systems are designed to provide for many more people than the amount that currently wandered the decks. For a short period of time, say a few weeks maybe, leaving all systems operating at status quo worked fine. But the Andromeda Ascendant was not built to be manned by such a small crew for an extended period of time.

Dylan and the others might think it's a simple matter of trimming the output, but Harper knew better. The small crew still needed access to most of the ship so it wasn't like you could just shut down environmentals in a corridor between command deck and the slipstream drive. You also couldn't leave things going at full power indefinitely.

Yes, on the surface it seemed like just a few subroutines. In actuality, it was entirely new programming that allowed the AI to monitor input and output, cross reference Co2 scrubbers with hydroponics O2 output, and decrease energy to temperature controls and inertial dampeners when warranted. It also maintained power requirements for a full crew complement so that Andromeda could take on a full house at a moment's notice. It was really a delicate balance and rather more complex than it seemed.

By using a feedback routine, Harper had tied unused energy into the auxiliary power pods. Which is just as well since they seemed to be draining their auxiliary power on an almost weekly basis.

Complicated? Well, that's a genius for you. Sometimes the most useful inventions are ones that go unnoticed.

FIVE  
"Harper," Beka stood in the doorway of the machine shop with her arms crossed and was looking at Harper like he'd grown two heads, "I'm almost afraid to ask, but ... what is that thing on your head?" She stared as she walked closer and circled Harper.

Harper hopped down from the workbench and proudly strutted around, showing off his latest contraption. The base of it was a hat, similar to a helmet but it didn't fit around his entire head, just the top. There were two cylinders attached to either side, with tubes running out, connecting, and strung out along what appeared to have at one time been a microphone. Instead of speaking into it, Harper reached his chin out and grabbed the end of the tubing in his mouth. Liquid moved through the tubing as Harper sucked in his cheeks. Harper released the tubing and let out a loud belch.

"I was browsing Rommie's databanks of old Earth stuff and saw one. I had to make my own. C'mon boss, it's just another way I'm a genius! Now I don't have to actually stop working and reach for my Sparky cola."

Harper began to demonstrate while continuing a steady stream of commentary on all the various projects strewn about the room. So intent on his own diatribe, he didn't even notice when Beka rolled her eyes and left the room.

***end***


End file.
